Still voiceless. Have been rooting through a drawer in a desk in our bedroom. Found pics and an envelope containing hair from Spencer's first official haircut. Grabbed the clear accordion folder with all Spencer's stuff and found feeding schedules and notes from daycare. It's amazing how much he's grown in a year. Ten inches and close to 20 lbs.
I missed a bunch of those early days due to Postpartum Depression. I don't know how forthcoming I've been about that, and from now on, I 'm determined not to avoid talking about it. ESPECIALLY after what Brooke Shields did. Who'd have ever thought I'd have something in common with Brooke Shields besides proximity to Princeton University.
I packed some boxes. We watched Gettysburg on TNT today. It's SIX hours long. That's at least twice as long as Scarface. Say hello to my extremely long movie! I wrote notes to Guy asking questions(tired of trying to whisper and having him go "What?" over and over) about the battle and surrounding history. He's on the ball with that stuff let me tell you. He'd be a great history teacher.
It's about time to crash out. But I'm watching BBC America (great network for Anglophiles) and the show "What Not To Wear" is on. There are these two gals, Susannah and Trinny. I saw them on Oprah once or twice.
They pick really dumpy ladies and make them beautiful-In a way that's appropriate.
In the shows I've had on, they've been dealing with moms of teenage girls. They helped this one woman who almost sounded like a man. She had a real cockney accent, and was so plain and so nondescript that she didn't seem salvageable. They really did a great job. She was so shocked when she saw how they'd primped her, she almost didn't speak. Her reaction was that she looked too good to actually be herself. Imagine that. You suddenly look as good as you could look, and you don't feel you're good enough to look that good.
It's really cool hearing all these British women speaking and using colloquialisms and slang I have no knowledge of. They all sound smarter just because of their accents. There's also a calm about Brits. It's funny everyone seemed to have overlooked it until the bombings. The media acted like Londoners were unusually calm in the face of incredible trauma.
DUH. Why do you think America happened? Stereotypically speaking, Brits have a tendency to be a bit repressed and passive-aggressive. That couldn't have helped their case in managing the colonies from so many thousands of miles away...I mean can you imagine men here working hard to build communities and industry from the ground up, and when problems arose and they tried to get assistance, they were greeted with things like a STAMP tax? They taxed tea, and our boys dressed up like friggin' Native Americans and dumped it into Boston Harbor. Talk about acting out!
So when you see the endless footage they'll show for the next week of the men and women, calmly but solemnly making their way out of the bombed Tube stations, remember, they've been sporting that kind of demeanor since before the Revolution. I wouldn't have expected behavior of any other sort. It's really just like us to suddenly notice how people from another country behave. They've been around longer than us, and we act like they just landed. Can you say "ethnocentric"?
Ok, I'm boring myself. Where was I intending to go with that? There is a teeny weeny bug crawling around on the screen and the little f***er is distracting me as I type. Go away before I squish you with my little pinky. EEEWW he crawled right up to where the lettters were moving on the screen. He's a smart little f***er.
If I was smart, I'd take some cough medicine like a good mommy and go to bed.
This bug has more common sense than me right now. Sure is busy. Hi bug. Shouldn't you be asleep? Are the lights keeping you up? I know you can't help but buzz around in their direction. If I turn off the screen, will you go to bed? He flew away. I can't explain why I called him a he.
"Quicker than a ray of light I'm flying" - "Ray of Light", Madonna*
*Also an Anglophile mum.
Saturday, July 09, 2005
Quiet, Mommy
The most torturous event has occurred. I have no voice.
Guy couldn't be happier. The first thing he said this morning when I demonstrated my situation, was "Hey Spencer it's gonna be really quiet around here today!" Accompanied by a smile, of course. Spencer is looking at me like I'm a loon. And on top of this, I had THE worst sleep I've had since Spencer was born and it had absolutely nothing to do with him.
I took Alka Seltzer Flu Plus so I could sleep last night, and about two hours later I finally passed out in front of the tv with Guy next to me. At 330 I roused Guy and we transferred our delirious selves into bed. I closed my eyelids, but my eyes did not feel closed. My mind was racing about moving and packing, about a potential change in the whole schedule, about high school, college and my life so far. It was like having an annoying relative or acquaintance in the room that I couldn't get rid of. My brain would not shut up.
I tossed, I turned for probably 45 minutes with no end in sight. Finally I decided there must be something soothing about the couch, so I left Guy in bed for the raggedy sectional in the tv room. No sooner had I snuggled in under an ancient red nylon comforter, in walked Guy. I waved. He tried to help me get to sleep and apparently it worked, because back to bed we went. Where I promptly woke up again. We switched sides of the bed to simulate how we rested in the tv room. An entire production for a little shut eye. Sheesh.
I'm writing this in a bit of a drug haze. All that dextromethorphan and anithistamine and whatever else sure does linger. Wow, I just checked to see if my spelling of dextromethorphan was right: I'm good!
I need work on the word "delirious" though.
Spencer and Guy played dog with a ball today. I'll elaborate on this another time. I'm quite consumed with my lack of voice, they're replaying Live 8 without the annoying VJ interruptions on VH1 (and its distracting me), and I need to get some packing done or something even though I just want to go to sleep.
In less than 3 weeks, we'll be living in the suburbs. Time flies when you're procrastinating.
Guy couldn't be happier. The first thing he said this morning when I demonstrated my situation, was "Hey Spencer it's gonna be really quiet around here today!" Accompanied by a smile, of course. Spencer is looking at me like I'm a loon. And on top of this, I had THE worst sleep I've had since Spencer was born and it had absolutely nothing to do with him.
I took Alka Seltzer Flu Plus so I could sleep last night, and about two hours later I finally passed out in front of the tv with Guy next to me. At 330 I roused Guy and we transferred our delirious selves into bed. I closed my eyelids, but my eyes did not feel closed. My mind was racing about moving and packing, about a potential change in the whole schedule, about high school, college and my life so far. It was like having an annoying relative or acquaintance in the room that I couldn't get rid of. My brain would not shut up.
I tossed, I turned for probably 45 minutes with no end in sight. Finally I decided there must be something soothing about the couch, so I left Guy in bed for the raggedy sectional in the tv room. No sooner had I snuggled in under an ancient red nylon comforter, in walked Guy. I waved. He tried to help me get to sleep and apparently it worked, because back to bed we went. Where I promptly woke up again. We switched sides of the bed to simulate how we rested in the tv room. An entire production for a little shut eye. Sheesh.
I'm writing this in a bit of a drug haze. All that dextromethorphan and anithistamine and whatever else sure does linger. Wow, I just checked to see if my spelling of dextromethorphan was right: I'm good!
I need work on the word "delirious" though.
Spencer and Guy played dog with a ball today. I'll elaborate on this another time. I'm quite consumed with my lack of voice, they're replaying Live 8 without the annoying VJ interruptions on VH1 (and its distracting me), and I need to get some packing done or something even though I just want to go to sleep.
In less than 3 weeks, we'll be living in the suburbs. Time flies when you're procrastinating.
Thursday, July 07, 2005
Ack! A Booger.
Some observations:
Spencer is saying "Ack" about and to everything. He points to the sky, he points up stairs, he repeats it over and over while being carried around the house and outside. He says it in the car, he says it near and far...wait a minute, who invited Dr. Seuss?
He's making some signs -like "more", "eat" and sometimes "milk", but lately he's invented one of his own, and it involves the shoving of his right forefinger up his right nostril and just sitting there looking at me. He doesn't move it around, just sits there with a finger up his nose. Someday, boy, I hope you'll tell me what that meant.
I tell you what, he has truly earned the nickname "Booger".
Spencer is saying "Ack" about and to everything. He points to the sky, he points up stairs, he repeats it over and over while being carried around the house and outside. He says it in the car, he says it near and far...wait a minute, who invited Dr. Seuss?
He's making some signs -like "more", "eat" and sometimes "milk", but lately he's invented one of his own, and it involves the shoving of his right forefinger up his right nostril and just sitting there looking at me. He doesn't move it around, just sits there with a finger up his nose. Someday, boy, I hope you'll tell me what that meant.
I tell you what, he has truly earned the nickname "Booger".
London Calling
Stupid t********s.
I won't use the word. I won't acknowledge them by name. They who shall remain nameless.
The day after London won the bid to host the 2012 Olympics, the starting day of the G8 Summit in Gleneagle, Scotland, frigging bombs went off in London. Our president immediately talked about spreading an "ideology of hope" to combat an "ideology of hate." The heads of Parliament expressed their sadness and dismay with many a "here here" echoing in unison, Spain stood tall and condemned the attacks completely, Americans went shopping for shoes and talked loudly on cell phones in drug stores....
What? Yep. Cell phones.
I was out and about this morning and I didn't hear ONE single person talking about what happened. Listening to NPR in the car, a commentator reported that some Americans, when polled about this incident, said they actually DIDN'T WANT TO KNOW about it. I don't think I get that. How does that help anything? How does it unite us in a common goal with the world if we don't even care what happens on the other side of our borders?
I was at Live 8 over the weekend and there was a similar issue. In Europe and Canada, the concerts and events around the concert got incredible coverage. Here, we could barely keep the performances going on screen in between VJ chatter and Axe cologne ads.
How can we be at war and be so isolationist? Oh and another thing, I'm confused about whether or not we're at war with Iraqi insurgents, or at war with terrorism in general. The president keeps changing the focus and I can't keep up.
In local news, during a surprise late night session this morning, the Pennsylvania Legislature passed a new state budget, complete with major pay hikes they approved for themselves. Nice. Gas is up to 62$ a barrel, kids in Philadelphia schools can't get proper text books, but legislators need more money. Let me guess...the cost of living has risen because of gas prices? Heh. Don't ask anyone in the street about it though. They might run away.
Wow this is pretty politically driven today.
I blame it on the fact that I'm sick with some on-coming cold, and I'm too tired to discuss my packing habits, or lack therof.
Have I mentioned I hate moving? But here 's the difference between me and t********s: I'm not going to bomb anything, write manifestos or oppress anyone. I also hate broccoli and cream sauces. Does that mean I should live the rest of my life planning to obliterate them from menus worldwide?
I'll go pick up Spencer before Hurricane Dennis comes to get us.
Everyone be nice.